Final Word: Skorting the issue

By Paul Moore

The majority of those reporting suggested that common sense had prevailed. Of all the euphemisms ever used in reporting, this is by far the most cliched. All but very few of those reading this cliched nonsense knew that common sense had not prevailed otherwise we would not have been in this situation in the first place. The same majority knew that what had prevailed was in fact female resistance and a refusal to allow others, many of whom are male, decide what they should wear when playing their chosen sport. That unified resistance means that women no longer have to wear skorts when playing camogie.

The whole debacle may seem ludicrous but much of it really matters, and not just to those playing the sport. Make no mistake but the imposition of skirts is entirely to do with the male gaze and what males deemed appropriate for a women to wear when undertaking physical exercise. It is also felt to be deeply sexist by the women themselves as is evidenced by research undertaken by the English hockey association which found that being made to wear skirts or indeed skorts was a key factor in the decision of many young women to give up the sport altogether. Arguments are offered about wishing to protect the modesty of women but always by those who have decided they are entitled to speak for those women.

So the wishes of those actually involved have actually prevailed. What should happen now? The most pleasing thing which could happen now would be if all the women playing camogie, in every large and small venue across the country, turned up for each and every game wearing skorts. Not only would this monumentally enrage those who have been insisting all along that they should do so but it would absolutely underline the fact that the decision about what is worn is being taken by the players. Perhaps they could compromise and wear the skorts in the first half and the shorts in the second. Or half the team could wear skorts and the other half shorts. Whatever combination of possibilities please let the players find as many ways as possible to drive the so-called traditionalists (for which read ‘neanderthals’) crazy while reminding them we do actually live in the 21st century.

It should not, of course, stop there. All the male teams playing around the country should now start wearing skorts as well. Not only will this be a shining example of solidarity but it will challenge the essentialist notion that there is a hierarchy in sport with men at the top of that hierarchy. And before there is outrage at this suggestion be reminded that men have been wearing skorts for some time if we are to believe what Jimmy Stewart told us about Donald and his ‘troosers’. I have often had a yearning for a kilt but there would definitely have been shorts underneath.

Come to think of it during the summer months any man who wants to don shorts ought by law be made to wear skorts. I have often pointed out that no male over the age of twelve ought to appear in public in shorts unless he is playing a sport and the imposition of skorts might put an end to the unedifying spectacle of pasty white porridge spoons sticking out of shapeless shorts at the end of which are socks and inappropriate sandals and all invariably adjacent to a barbecue.

Last weekend apparently marked the tenth anniversary of the passing of the equality/same sex legislation in Ireland. Inevitably things have regressed somewhat since those halcyon days but I would imagine that few would have believed in 2015 that it would take ten years before the GAA would let women make decisions which impacted solely on their right to play their sport on their own terms.