Launch of new child bereavement group in Tyrone

‘I felt as if my heart was ripped out of me’

Kate Corrigan recalls the moment she was told her son had died in a road collision last Christmas

“I just knew… I felt as if my heart was ripped out of me, and I went to pieces.”

Kate Corrigan had been awakened by a knock on the door of her home at Garvaghey early on the morning of December 27 last year.

It’s a knock that every parent dreads… and hopes will never come.

“It was about 7.30am when I heard the doorbell ringing… I could see the police uniform through the glass window.”

Up until that moment, the Corrigan family had been enjoying another family Christmas.

Their home was full of decorations and the lights on the tree were twinkling.

The previous night was Boxing night, and Kate’s 20-year-old son, Nathan, had gone out. He dressed up in his new Christmas clothes and put on some aftershave, excited about what lay ahead.

Kate exchanged a few text messages with Nathan afterwards.

Later on, she was aware that he hadn’t come home, but thought nothing of it. Nathan was probably staying with his friends – just like he had done before.

Kate had no idea that Nathan had been killed in a horrific collision close to his home at the A5 junction near St Matthew’s Church and Kelly’s Inn.

He was a passenger in a car which also included his friends, Peter Finnegan and Petey McNamee, from Clogher and Sixmilecross, respectively. Those young men were also killed when the car collided with a lorry.

A fourth person in the car, Michael Moore, also from Sixmilecross, was seriously injured.

Kate had heard there was a collision, but didn’t contemplate that Nathan could have been involved… Until the police arrived.

She told the UH, “I could see the police uniform through the glass in the door. To be honest, I don’t know how I got the strength to open it. Once I heard those words, ‘Are you Mrs Corrigan?’… I just knew. I felt as if my heart was ripped out of me. I went to pieces.

“The police then confirmed that Nathan was one of the three deceased.”

Kate says the following days and months ‘passed in a blur’.

The tragic nature of the collision drew widespread media attention.

Nathan’s funeral was held at St Matthew’s Church at Garvaghey, and wsa attended by hundreds of mourners. Parish priest, Michael O’Dwyer, used the opportunity to call for the long-awaited upgrade of the A5 road in the wake of the crash.

He said, “Nathan’s life could mirror many young men of his age – a life full of possibility, of hopes and dreams for the future, for all his tomorrows. But tomorrow never came.

“The deaths of Nathan and Peter Finnegan and Petey McNamee have highlighted, again, the danger that the present A5 road poses and the need for an upgrade.”

But Kate and her family were consumed by grief, shock and trauma.

“The loss, pain, suffering and grief is always there. And I don’t think that will never change,” she said.

“It’s just very hard to deal with: When you lose your child, you’re grieving for the life they had, the life they were living, and the future they will not see.

“Nathan was just only 20 – his 21st birthday was the week after he died… He was literally just starting out in life.”

Kate has found immense strength in the support and compassion the family has received since the collision. This encouraged her to get involved in the ‘Child Loss Matters’ group so she can help others.

“People see me out and about and think I’m being strong… But what choice do I have? You must get on with life.

“Every day is different: You might get up one morning and think you are doing alright, but then something sets you off – some trigger and you’ve no control over it.

“You just have to find ways to survive, and I think that’s what could be good about this group. I want to hear other people’s experiences and what they’ve been though. Maybe they can help me; maybe I can help them.

“That’s what it’s all about, really. To be there for each other.”

Kate cherishes Nathan’s text messages and voicemails. She often reads and listens to them to retain a connection with her son.

“Those messages are so important; just to read and hear his voice again as if he was talking to you… The last ones we shared were wishing each other a happy Christmas, ‘love you’, and all of that.

“And of course Nathan asking me for money,” Kate laughed. “We’d have a bit of banter about that, but I’d always relent and give him some.

“It’s just another way of keeping Nathan alive,” she continued.

“I feel he’s always with us and always with me – and that he’s always in my heart, giving me the strength to carry on each day.

“You have no choice; you must go on.”

The first meeting of Child Loss Matters takes place in the Silverbirch Hotel, Omagh this Saturday morning at 10am. Light refreshments will be served at 11.15am, and the group will meet there on the last Saturday of each month.