Dromore native embodied extraordinary decency

It is sometimes said that the lion’s share of sin is not committed by those who are too weak to act, but by those who are possessed of strength but don’t bother to use it.

Indifference is commonplace; apathy is all around us. Few people take a proactive attitude to alleviating the suffering of others, especially those they have never met.

However, every so often, a Good Samaritan is born; somebody that cannot walk on by as their fellow man or woman lies wretched in the gutter. Their kind nature compels them to take notice, then responsibility, then action.

This was the sort of indefatigably decent and instinctively virtuous person that the late Mary Maguire was.

Originally from the townland of Badoney, later moving to Dromore, this once-upon-a-time pupil of Dullaghan Primary School and the Loreto Grammar School would grow up to live a life of seldom-seen selflessness, spending her last 15 years founding and running an orphanage in Mombassa, Kenya, along with her husband, Kevin.

The first-born of four children between Peter and Dympna Mullin, Mary’s life was remarkable, not because of the money she made, assets she acquired, or social status she commanded, but because of everything she did for the sake of others.

Sadly, at the end of May, after 62 years of service and generosity, Mary’s candle went out.

Earlier this week, we spoke with her son, Kevin, who, with strength, dignity and compassion, lucidly reflected on his mother’s life and death.

“A couple of months ago, my mother received a terminal cancer diagnosis. We were told she didn’t have long. I grabbed a copy of one of her favourite books, Pema Chödrön’s ‘When Things Fall Apart’, stuffed some black clothes into a bag, and jumped on the next plane to Manchester.

“I read it to myself 30,000ft above the English Channel.

“We read it together by her bedside, my dad listening intently. I then ordered two of her all-time favourites to be delivered to the house – Gabriel Garcia Marquez’s ‘Love in the Time of Cholera’ and Bill Bryon’s ‘A Walk in the Woods’.

“I clearly expected more time together,” said Kevin

Minutes before Mary took her last breath, a priest arrived at the house.

This was the third in as many days.

“The door knocked, and it was another man of the cloth who considered Mum a close friend. You can’t expect to have been crowned ‘Catholic Woman of the Year 2013’, and not pick up some clergy superfans along the way,” smiled Kevin.

During this final visit to her home in Bolton, England, the priest sat by Mary’s bedside and began to sing, as she slipped away.

“Father Jim said that in 30 years of service, he’d never seen such a beautiful passing.”

As has already been mentioned, after living many years in Scotland and then Manchester, Mary and her husband, Kevin, founded and ran a children’s home in Mombassa, Kenya, called the Good Life Orphanage.

Kevin explained the origins.

“It was a family holiday to Kenya when we were teenagers that would define the final chapter of Mary’s life,” he said. “My parents returned from that holiday, and were so moved by the people and the poverty, that they wanted to do something to help.

“They didn’t speak Swahili, they didn’t know how local laws and bureaucracy worked, they had no idea how to run a charity in one country, let alone two. But they did it.

“I always thought they were out of their minds to undertake such a project. I learned in the last few days that Mum and Dad often said the same thing to each other. But that was Mum in a nutshell: Just like the Gospel read that she chose for her funeral: She was unable to witness the pain of others and walk on by.

“She dedicated the final chapter of her life to helping those who weren’t born into the same privilege most people at home have been.

“As her friend, Anne-Marie, said after her passing, ‘She made us all better people by opening our eyes to the suffering of others’.”

Kevin described his mother’s life as ‘one of sacrifice’.

Where most people place themselves above everything, Mary put her herself second to family, friends and strangers.

“She gave everything she had for others: For her husband, children and grandchildren. For the hundreds of kids who came through the gates of The Good Life Orphanage, finding love and warmth awaiting them. The hundreds more kids who enrolled at St Bernadette Mary School to find a way out of poverty through education. The disabled children who came to Hattie’s House, and received occupational therapy after years of living with untreated ailments. And that’s without getting into all the staff, extended families, and community members gathered into her loving embrace,” said Kevin.

For the rest of his life, Kevin said, he will use the example set by his mother to guide him in the right direction.

“Realising how wonderful of a woman she was, I will always ask myself, ‘How can I be more Mary?’. How can I carry her in my hearts and take her strength to help navigate my own moments of struggle? How can I embody her patience, determination and grace?

“How can I be a better person, putting others’ needs ahead of my own? How can I look out for others; not just those who have, but those who have not?

“How can I forgive and forget? How can I learn to love and let go?

“It’s a tall order. Mum made it look so easy. It won’t be, especially without her. But we can use what she left us. We can take a little bit of her light and love and spread it far and wide; every day, in every way, we might ask ourselves, ‘How we could be more Mary?’.”

Mary’s husband, Kevin Sr, her son Kevin Jr, her two daughters, Sinead and Claire, as well as her many beloved grandchildren, encourage anybody who was touched this story to visit the Good Life Orphanage on either their website or Facebook page, where, if you wish, you can leave a kind word or donation.